Parenthood doesn’t begin with a positive pregnancy test—it begins with the decisions you make long before you conceive.
When people ask us about our pregnancy journey, they usually expect us to talk about the day we found out we were pregnant.
But for us, the journey started almost two years before conception.
As an arranged marriage couple, we consciously chose not to rush into parenthood.
Not because we didn’t want children.
But because we wanted to become the kind of parents our future child deserved.
This blog is not medical advice. It is simply our personal journey—the steps we took, the lessons we learned, and how we prepared ourselves physically, emotionally, mentally, and financially before welcoming our daughter into this world.
Table of Contents
Why We Didn’t Rush Into Parenthood
The first two years of our marriage were dedicated to building our relationship.
We travelled.
We enjoyed our freedom.
We learned about each other.
We made mistakes.
We grew together.
Most importantly, we became best friends before becoming parents.
We strongly believed that before raising a child, we needed to strengthen the foundation of our own relationship.
Because one day, our child would learn love, respect, communication, and kindness by watching us.
Questions Every Couple Should Ask Before Planning Pregnancy
Before deciding to have a baby, we spent months discussing questions that many couples often overlook.
- Are we financially stable enough to raise a child?
- Are we emotionally ready for parenthood?
- Is our relationship strong enough to handle sleepless nights and new responsibilities?
- Are we physically healthy?
- Are our career goals aligned?
- Are our parenting values similar?
- Are we prepared to sacrifice our comfort and routine?
- What kind of childhood do we want to give our future child?
These conversations weren’t always easy.
Sometimes we disagreed.
Sometimes they became emotional.
But every discussion made us stronger as partners.
Dealing with Society’s Pressure
If you’re an Indian couple, you’ve probably heard questions like:
“Any good news?”
“When are you planning a baby?”
“It’s already been two years!”
Some people ask because they genuinely care.
Others ask simply because they feel entitled to know.
We heard all of it.
People wondered why we were focusing on our careers, our health, and ourselves instead of planning a baby immediately.
But we had already decided that our timeline would be ours—not society’s.
We smiled.
We changed the topic.
We ignored unnecessary pressure.
As we say,
“Logon ka kaam hai kehna.”
People will always have something to say.
Your life should never be lived according to someone else’s expectations.
One Conversation That Changed Everything
There was one group of people whose opinions truly mattered to us—our parents.
Instead of allowing assumptions or repeated questions, we chose honesty.
Around the first year of our marriage, we sat down with both families and openly shared our plans.
We discussed:
- Our financial goals
- Career plans
- Health goals
- Personal aspirations
- Our timeline for parenthood
That one conversation changed everything.
Our parents understood that we weren’t avoiding responsibility.
We were preparing for it.
Instead of questioning us, they became our biggest supporters.
The peace of mind that came from their trust was priceless.
Visiting a Gynecologist Before Planning Pregnancy
Towards the end of 2024, we started thinking seriously about becoming parents.
One reason was our age.
I was approaching 28 and my husband was nearing 31.
Rather than relying on Google or family advice, we decided to consult an experienced gynecologist.
Our goal was simple.
We wanted to know whether we needed to improve anything before trying to conceive.
During the consultation, my husband asked something that made me incredibly proud.
He asked,
“Doctor, if you’re recommending tests for my wife, could you also suggest any tests for me? We’d like to complete everything together so we know we’re both healthy.”
The doctor smiled.
Then he explained that pregnancy evaluation generally begins with the woman.
If anything abnormal is found, only then is the husband evaluated further.
Although medically understandable, that conversation reminded us how pregnancy planning is still largely viewed as a woman’s responsibility.
For us, however, parenthood had always been a shared responsibility.
My Pre-Pregnancy Health Check-Up
The doctor recommended a comprehensive health screening before we started trying for a baby.
Thankfully, every report came back normal.
These tests gave us confidence that we were starting our journey from a healthy foundation.
1. Complete Blood Count (Haemogram)
This test checks your overall health by evaluating red blood cells, white blood cells, hemoglobin levels, and platelets.
It helps detect anemia and infections that could affect pregnancy.
2. HbA1c (Glycosylated Haemoglobin)
This measures your average blood sugar levels over the previous three months.
It helps identify undiagnosed diabetes before pregnancy.
3. Oral Glucose Challenge Test (OGCT)
This screens for gestational diabetes.
Early detection helps manage blood sugar levels and reduces pregnancy complications.
4. Thyroid Stimulating Hormone (TSH)
Healthy thyroid function is extremely important for fertility and your baby’s brain development.
5. Hepatitis B Surface Antigen (Australia Antigen Test)
This checks for Hepatitis B infection.
Early diagnosis helps protect both mother and baby.
6. Hepatitis C (HCV)
This screens for Hepatitis C infection.
7. HIV Spot Test
A routine screening test to detect HIV before pregnancy.
8. VDRL Test
This screens for Syphilis.
Detecting and treating it before pregnancy helps prevent serious complications.
9. Hemoglobin Electrophoresis
This identifies inherited blood disorders such as Thalassemia and Sickle Cell Trait.
Knowing your carrier status before pregnancy is extremely valuable.
My PCOD Journey
Several years before planning pregnancy, I had been diagnosed with PCOD.
Many people assume managing PCOD requires an extremely strict lifestyle.
My experience was different.
I didn’t follow crash diets.
I wasn’t obsessed with calorie counting.
I wasn’t spending hours in the gym.
Instead, I focused on consistency.
I performed a few simple exercises regularly.
The exercises that personally helped me were:
- Butterfly Pose (Baddha Konasana)
- Malasana (Deep Squat Pose)
- Legs-Up-the-Wall Pose (Viparita Karani)
Apart from these exercises, I stayed active, enjoyed balanced meals, and avoided stressing over perfection.
Consistency mattered much more than intensity.
Please note: Every woman’s body is different. These exercises worked for me but may not be suitable for everyone. Always consult your doctor or physiotherapist before beginning any exercise routine.
Starting My Folic Acid Course
One of the first things my gynecologist advised was to begin ALL 9 BOH (Folic Acid) before trying to conceive.
Many couples think pregnancy supplements start after a positive pregnancy test.
In reality, folic acid is most beneficial before conception and during the earliest weeks of pregnancy, often before a woman even realizes she is pregnant.
I completed my folic acid course exactly as prescribed by my doctor.
Folic acid plays a crucial role in reducing the risk of neural tube defects that affect the baby’s brain and spinal cord.
It also supports healthy early fetal development.
This is why doctors usually recommend starting folic acid at least one month before conception.
Please don’t self-medicate. Always take supplements under your doctor’s guidance.
Preparing Beyond Medical Tests
Medical tests were only a small part of our preparation.
The real preparation happened at home.
We improved our communication.
We became financially more disciplined.
We adopted healthier habits.
We learned patience.
We discussed parenting styles.
We strengthened our marriage.
Slowly, we stopped thinking only as husband and wife.
We started thinking like future parents.
What This Journey Taught Us
Preparing for pregnancy isn’t about becoming perfect.
It’s about becoming prepared.
Every couple’s story will be different.
Some conceive quickly.
Some take longer.
Some need medical support.
Some face unexpected challenges.
None of these journeys are less beautiful.
The important thing is to enter parenthood with awareness rather than assumptions.
Our Advice to Every Couple Planning Pregnancy
Don’t let society decide your timeline.
Don’t compare your journey with anyone else’s.
Talk openly with your partner.
Consult a qualified doctor before trying to conceive.
Take care of your physical and mental health.
Build financial stability.
Spend quality time together.
Strengthen your relationship before expanding your family.
Because one day, your child will grow up watching the relationship you built long before they were born.
Final Thoughts
When we finally welcomed our daughter into our lives, we realized something beautiful.
The happiest part wasn’t simply becoming parents.
It was knowing that we had entered parenthood with confidence, clarity, and intention.
Looking back today, every conversation, every medical test, every health habit, every ignored opinion, and every small step was worth it.
Because parenthood doesn’t begin with childbirth.
It begins with preparation.
And preparation is one of the greatest gifts you can give your future child.
Disclaimer
The experiences shared in this article are based on our personal journey and are intended for informational purposes only. They should not be considered medical advice. Every couple’s health and fertility journey is unique. Always consult a qualified gynecologist or healthcare professional before planning pregnancy, starting supplements, or making health-related decisions.
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